You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
Randomize