You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
