if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Randomize
