Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
