I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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