i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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