So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
Randomize