I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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