I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Randomize
