Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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