dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
