real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
