Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Drunk is not a location!
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
