(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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