why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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