He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
Randomize
