She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
