He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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