i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
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