he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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