Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
