whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize