I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
