Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
