who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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