WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
