I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
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