some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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