Midget sex pt 2 tonight
she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
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