did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Randomize
