Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Randomize
