Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
