Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Randomize
