she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
