Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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