shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
