We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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