my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
