Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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