North Korea, Best Korea!
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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