Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
