Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
Randomize
