I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
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