I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
