If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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