so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
