she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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