I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
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