Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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