About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I would ride that face into the sunset
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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