lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
