No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
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